I'm trying to give proper closure to this frazzling day but I still don't know how to do that. It's been seven years since I stepped out of the house to face a public audience. To be honest, I know that Komisyon sa Wikang Filipino was publishing two of my books but I didn't know that they would nominate me for a Dangal ng Panitikan award and give me only two weeks' notice to receive it. My recollection of the last few workshops I conducted in Singapore and in Bacolod City came rushing in, and I felt stressed. 

It was very nice to be dressed for an occasion again, especially with Aubrey, who chose our lunch venue and afterward one of her favorite coffee shops for coffee and dessert. I was also glad that Paul Dumol and one of his faculty members followed us to Mesa for lunch, where we had a pleasant, post-awarding-ceremonies conversation. But, I lost a painting day, and that day can never be recovered.

I do remember that I decided to go to the awarding ceremonies because one of the trophies was a bust of Balagtas, and I'd always wanted one. So, I'm reverently placing that and the heavy, brass medallion inside a glass etagere, and I'm hoping that I can finally wind down and have a good night's sleep tonight.

Tomorrow I'll just hole up in the studio area and refuse to admit anyone into our house.